I Still Watch The Lion King (by choice)

The other day when I was riding in the truck with my husband, I realized how I was sitting in the seat. I was all crunched up in a little ball, sucking on a cup with a crazy straw, and picking at my fingernails. I was somewhat embarrassed that I looked like a bored 12 year old girl being forced to ride to the mall with her mother. I was picking at my nails like I was a bad ass and frustrated with the world, just like I did when I was 12 and going through my "awkward phase". And it occurred to me, I am 30 years old, but I still think like I am twelve half of the time. What do I really know now that I didn't know when I was a kid? What has 27,000 dollars worth of education taught me, except that psychology class via video never works and going to school on Saturday is worse than having my eyelashes set on fire?

I still know the same about math that I did at 12-I hate it. The same goes for science and most other subjects except for English. As far as education goes, the only thing I've learned is every aspect of the Civil War because I only took about 12 classes on the whole thing. Yeah, Im privy to the knowledge of labor, delivery and motherhood, and I know a thing or two more about love than I did when I was a kid. At that age, I thought sharing Starbursts and letting some snot nosed little boy borrow my colored pencils mean that we were going "steady". But, obvious things aside, I don't feel like a grown up. Thirty isn't too ancient by any means, but it is when I think about my childhood and how long ago 21 seems to me now. This really sets in if I am jamming some Springsteen "Glory Days" or John Cougar's words of "Hold on to 16 as long as you can" rings in my ears.

Back to riding in the truck with my husband.... (Yeah, my husband. Not my boyfriend or my crush or some random guy I met behind the club in an alley (sarcasm here), but my bound -by -the- law and God and a band of white gold HUSBAND) Anyway, I realized that I should probably sit up straight and remove the crazy straw from my grown up sippy cup, and I should probably quit cussing so much like it is cool and refrain from saying childish words like "whatever".  A "woman" my age shouldn't pick her fingernails or get excited when there are stickers left in the back of the Highlights magazine at my child's pediatrician's office.

When did I get so old? When did the neighborhood kids start calling me Mrs. Susannah and when did I start carpooling kids to various extracurricular activities and yelling out, "Did you save the Box Top on those Cheerios before you threw the box away?" as if I was 18 screaming, "Who took my beer?"  Wasn't it just yesterday when I locked myself in my room, listened to the radio, talked on the phone for nearly 8 hours straight, and wrote in a journal? Now my child, MY CHILD, runs up to her room, shuts the door, and turns on Kidz Bop. When did I end up on the OLD side of the table???

Yes, I am a 30 year old mother for goodness sakes. It is time to quit putting Pink Floyd "Dark Side of the Moon" in the CD player everytime I notice that TNT is running "The Wizard of Oz" commercial free. And, perhaps it's past time for me to toss my vintage T-shirts with The Doors and Jimi Hendrix and Carlton Banks doing a white boy dance on them. I'm not planning on getting the Trish haircut, or trading in the gas guzzling mommy SUV for a Town and Country (nothing against anyone who drives this, by the way), but I really should try to grow up a little bit. After pondering all of this in the passenger seat, I shrugged it off, blew some bubbles in my Dr. Pepper and searched my purse for some Grape Bubblicious. Oh well, hopefully I will mature one day.