Whole Lhasa Weirdness Going On

My dog died.

I could tell that incredibly tear-jerking story, chocked full of adjectives, describing the moment we first met in 1990, the day that she died in 2007.

Are you doing the math? She was old, wasn’t she? Which means she grew old with me and I grew up with her.

I could tell you how she was the absolute love of my life, my reason for being, my confidant and my best friend.

Yes, it’s an incredibly tear-jerking story.

But, I’m not going to tell that story.

Instead, I’m going to tell the story of the day that sweet, precious, darling little Lhasa Apso named Peaches was contacted by aliens.

It was late when I returned home that night. I opened the front door, and the dim light from the television was casting shadows on the wall.

I always left The Weather Channel on for Peaches. She loved TWC music, especially the instrumental version of Pink Floyd’s “Shine on You Crazy Diamond."  When I opened the door that night, some jazz melody was playing as the radar map showed a line of green thunderstorms heading our way.  

Peaches didn’t meet me at the door, as she had for the last decade. She was getting older, so I was immediately worried.

I began calling her name when my foot stepped on a hard pile. I bent over and examined the mound. Rocks? Pebbles? Cap’n Crunch?

No, it was a pile of dog food. It was a perfectly stacked pile of dog food, like a little mountain.

I looked around the living room. There was another little pile. And another. Identical little heaps of food trailed down the hallway, all equally spread 2 or 3 feet apart.

The path of piles led me to the bedroom, where Peaches was hiding beneath the bed. She was scared, shaking. I’d never seen her so nervous, with the exception of Fourth of July when fireworks sent her into a tizzy which called for a dog Valium concealed in a hot dog.

I repeatedly asked her what was wrong, fearing something terrible had happened to her. I feared she had been probed with more than the questions that I was now asking.

What other explanation could there be? Aliens had visited my Lhasa Apso.

The small piles of dog food? Evidently they were a sign, the dog version of crop circles.  

Peaches never revealed what had happened, although she spent the night barking for no obvious reason. We crawled into the bed, the rain poured, and I held her close.

And we both slept with one eye open.